Kungabe Wethembeke Kubani?

Usuku ngalunye eniluphilayo nenidlula kulo njengamanje lubucayi futhi lubaluleke kakhulu ekusaseni lenu kanye nalokho enikumiselwe, kumele nikwazise konke eninakho ngawo wonke umzuzu odlulayo.

Kumele nisisebenzise kahle isikhathi senu ukuze nizinike inzuzo enkulu, ukuze ningabi abaphile lokhu kuphila ezeni. Mhlawumbe nizizwa ninokudideka ukuba kungani Mina ngikhuluma lamazwi. Ngokweqiniso, Mina angithokozile ngezenzo zenu nonke. Ngokuba amathemba ebenginawo ngani awasikhona lokhu eniyikho njengamanje. Ngenxa yalokho, Ngingakuveza ngale ndlela: Nina nonke nisengcupheni yengozi. Ukukhalela kwenu insindiso kwakudala kanye nokulangazelela okudlulile kokushisekela iqiniso kanye nokufuna ukukhanya sekufike ekupheleni. Yile ndlela eningibonga ngayo Mina ekugcineni, okuyinto engingakaze ngiyilangazelele. Angifisi ukukhuluma okuphambene neqiniso, ngokuba Mina ningidumaze kakhulu. Mhlawumbe anifisi ukushiya udaba lusale kanjalo futhi anifisi ukubhekana neqiniso, nokho kumele nginibuze lombuzo ngokuzithoba: Kuyo yonke leminyaka, kungabe zigcwaliswe yini izinhliziyo zenu? Kungabe izinhliziyo zenu zethembeke kubani? Ningasho ukuthi umbuzo Wami uze ningazelele, futhi ningangibuzi Mina ukuthi kungani ngiletha umbuzo onjena. Kumele nikwazi lokhu: Kungenxa yokuthi ngiyanazi kahle kakhulu, ngiyaninakekela kakhulu, futhi nginikela kakhulu inhliziyo Yami kulokhu enikwenzayo, lokho nginibuza khona ngokuphindelela futhi ngibekezelele ubunzima obungachazeki. Nokho-ke, Mina ngibongwa ngokunganakwa kanye nokushiywa okungabekezeleleki. Ngakho aninginakile Mina; kungenzeka kanjani ukuba ngingazi lutho ngakho? Uma nikholwa ukuthi lokhu kungenzeka, kuyaqhubeka nokufakazela ukuthi ngempela Mina aningiphathi ngomusa. Ngakho Mina ngiyanitshela ukuthi niyazikhohlisa. Nina nonke enihlakaniphe ngale ndlela yokuthi anazi ukuthi nenzani; ngalokho-ke yini eniyakuyisebenzisa ukuziphendulela Kimi?

Umbuzo engikhathazekile ngawo Mina ukuthi kungabe izinhliziyo zenu zethembeke kubani. Ngifisa ukuba yilowo nalowo kini ahlele imicabango yakhe bese ezibuza ukuthi kungabe wethembeke kubani futhi uphilela bani. Mhlawumbe, anikaze niwucabangisise lombuzo, ngakho-ke ake nginambulele impendulo Mina.

Bonke labo abakhumbulayo bazolivuma leliqiniso: Umuntu uziphilela yena futhi wethembeke kuye. Angikholwa ukuthi impendulo yakho iyiqiniso yonke, ngokuba nonke niphila izimpilo zenu ngokungafani, ngamunye wenu niyazabalaza ekuhluphekeni kwenu. Ngakho-ke, enethembeke kukho, abantu abanithandayo kanye nezinto ezinithokozisayo, futhi anethembekanga kunina ngokupheleleyo. Ngoba ngamunye wenu nithonywe ngabantu, izehlakalo, kanye nezinto ezinizungezile, anithembekanga kunina ngokweqiniso. Ngikhuluma lamazwi hhayi ukuncoma ukuthembeka kwenu kinina, kodwa ukuveza ukwethembeka kwenu kunoma iyiphi into eyodwa. Ngokuba kuyo yonke leminyaka, Mina angikaze ngithole ukwethembeka kukanoma ubani komunye wenu. Ningilandelile yonke leminyaka, nokho anikaze ninginikeze nokuncanyana kokwethembeka kwenu. Kunalokho, nigxile kubantu enibathandayo kanye nezinto ezinithokozisayo, kangangokuthi zisondezwe eduzane nezinhliziyo zenu futhi azisoze zalahlwa, noma ngasiphi isikhathi, noma kuphi. Uma nimagange noma ninentshisekelo noma ngayiphi into eyodwa eniyithandayo, kuhlala njalo kube ngalesi sikhathi enilandela Mina ngaso, noma ngesikhathi nilalele amazwi Ami. Ngalokho Mina ngithi, nisebenzisa ukwethembeka engikucela kini, esikhundleni nithembeka ezintweni enizithandayo futhi nazise zona. Noma ninganikela ngento noma ezimbili Kimi, akumeli uqobo lwenu lonke, futhi akubonisi ukuthi Yimi enethembeke kuye ngokweqiniso. Nizimbandakanya nezethembiso eninentshisekelo ngazo: Abanye bathembeke kumadodana namadodakazi, abanye kubayeni, amakhosikazi, ingcebo, umsebenzi, abaphathi, isimo sempilo, noma abesifazane. Kulokho enethembeke kukho, anikaze nizizwe nikhathele noma nicasukile; kunalokho, niyakhula ekulangazeleleni ukuba nibe nokuningi kanye nezinto ezisezingeni kulokhu enethembeke kukho, futhi anikaze niphelelwe ithemba. Mina kanye namazwi Ami sihlala siphushelwa ekugcineni ngokwezinto enizishisekelayo. Futhi awunakho okunye ongakukhetha ngaphandle kokuba uwabeke ekugcineni; abanye indawo esekugcineni bayishiyela ukwethembeka ezintweni abasazozithola abangazazi. Alikho inani abake bangibekela lona Mina ezinhlizweni zabo. Mhlawumbe ucabanga ukuthi Mina ngicela okuningi kakhulu kuwe noma ngikubeka icala ngokungafanele, kodwa wake wakucabanga lokhu ukuthi ngesikhathi uchitha isikhathi nomndeni wakho ngentokozo, awukaze wethembeke Kimi? Ngezikhathi ezifana nalezi, akukuzwisi yini ubuhlungu? Ngesikhathi izinhliziyo zenu zigcwele injabulo nithola amaholo ngemisebenzi yenu, anizizwa nidumele ngokuthi anizinikezanga iqiniso elanele? Kunini lapho owakhaliswa khona ukuthi awuyitholanga imvume Yami? Nihlupha izingqondo zenu ngamadodana kanye namadodakazi enu, nangalokho futhi ananeliseki, nikholwa ukuthi anibakhuthalelanga, ukuthi aninikelanga ngemizamo yenu yonke. Kodwa Kimi, benilokhu ninganendaba futhi nibudedengu, Mina ningigcina kuphela ezinkumbulweni kodwa hhayi ezinhlizweni zenu. Ukuzinikela Kwami kanye nemizamo Yami ihlala njalo ingazwakali kini, futhi anikaze nizame ukuqonda. Nimane nizimbandakanye nokucabanga isikhashana bese niyakholwa ukuthi kuzo kwanela. Le ndlela “yokwethembeka” akusiyona lena ebengiyilangazelela, kodwa yileyo okukade yaba isinengiso Kimi. Nokho, nakuba ngikusho lokhu, nizoqhubeka nokuvuma kuphela into eyodwa noma ezimbili kodwa futhi ningakwazi ukukwamukela, ngokuba nonke niqinisekile, futhi nihlala njalo nikhetha lokhu enifuna ukukwamukela emazwini Mina engiwakhulumile. Uma nisenza ngale ndlela, Mina nginazo izindlela ezigodliwe zokulwa nokuzethemba kwenu, futhi Mina ngiyakuzenza ukuze nivume ukuthi onke amazwi Ami ayiqiniso futhi awasiyo inhlanekezelo yeqiniso.

Uma Mina bengingabeka ingcebo phambi kwenu manje bese ngikucela ukuba nikhethe ngokukhululeka, nazi ukuthi[a] Mina angeke nginahlulele, abaningi bayakukhetha ingcebo bese belahla iqiniso. Abangcono kini bayakuyeka ingcebo bese bekhetha iqiniso ngokungabaza, ngaleso sikhathi labo abaphakathi nendawo bayothatha ingcebo ngesinye isandla neqiniso ngakwesinye. Ngalendlela, angeke yini ubuwena bube sobala? Uma nikhetha phakathi kweqiniso kanye nanoma yini enithembeke kuyo, nonke niyokwenza isinqumo, bese kuthi isimo sengqondo yenu singaguquki. Ingabe akunjalo? Ingabe ababaningi yini phakathi kwenu abehla benyuka phakathi kokulungile nokungalungile? Emncintiswaneni phakathi kokuhle nokubi, okumnyama nokumhlophe, nizazi ngokwesiqiniseko izinqumo enazenza phakathi komndeni noNkulunkulu, abantwana noNkulunkulu, ukuthula nokuthikamezeka, ingcebo nobumpofu, ubukhulu nokuba umuntukazana, ukwesekwa nokudelwa, kanye nokunye. Phakathi komndeni onokuthula kanye nonomsindo, nakhetha okokuqala, futhi ngaphandle kokungabaza; phakathi kwengcebo kanye nomsebezi, naphinde futhi nakhetha okokuqala, naze nalahlekelwa nayintando yokubuyela kwisisekelo;[b] phakathi komnotho nobumpofu, nakhetha okokuqala; phakathi kwamadodona, amadodakazi, amakhosikazi, abayeni, kanye Nami, nakhetha okokuqala; futhi phakathi komcabango neqiniso, naphinda futhi nakhetha okokuqala. Ngokubhekana nalo lonke uhlobo lobubi benu, Mina anginalutho olusele lokulahlekelwa ukukholwa Kwami kini. Mina ngishaqeke kakhulu ngokuthi izinhliziyo zenu zibe nokumelana nokuthi zithambile. Iminyaka eminingi yokuzinikela kanye nokuzama kungilethele ngokusobala ukushiwa Kwami kuphela kanye nokuthi Mina ngiphelelwe ithemba. Nokho amathemba Ami ngani ayakhula ngosuku ngalunye oludlulayo, ngokuba usuku Lwami selubekiwe ngokupheleleyo phambi kwawo wonke umuntu. Nokho-ke, niyaqhubeka nokufuna lokho okungokwasebumnyameni kanye nasebubini, futhi niyenqaba ukuxegisa lokhu enibambelele kukho. Ngokunjalo, kuyoba yini umphumela wakho? Ingabe uke wakucabangisisa lokhu ngaphambili? Uma ubungacelwa ukuba ukhethe futhi, ingabe ungama kuphi? Kungaba ilokhu kokuqala namanje? Lokhu eninganginika khona Mina kungaba ukuphoxeka kanye nosizi lokudabuka? Ingabe izinhliziyo zenu ziyoqhubeka nokuba kube inina kuphela eninemfudumalo? Ingabe usazoqhubeka nokungazi ukuthi kumele wenzeni ukuze ududuze inhliziyo Yami? Kulo mzuzu, siyini isinqumo sakho? Ingabe uzozithoba emazwini Ami noma uzokhathala yiwo? Usuku Lwami selumisiwe phambi kwamehlo akho, futhi lokhu obhekene nakho impilo entsha kanye nesiqalo esisha. Nokho-ke, Mina kumele ngikutshele ukuthi lesi siqalo akusikho ukuqala komsebenzi omdala kabusha, kodwa ukuvalwa kokudala. Okusho ukuthi, lesi isenzo sokugcina. Mina ngiyakholwa ukuthi niyaqonda ukuthi yini engajwayelekile ngalesi siqalo. Kodwa ngolunye usuku masinyane, niyakuqonda incazelo yeqiniso yesiqalo, ngakho asihambisane ndawonye futhi singene esiphethweni esilandelayo! Nokho-ke, engiqhubeka nokungakhululeki ngakho ukuthi uma ubhekene nokungalungi kanye nobulungiswa, ulokhu ukhetha okokuqala. Kodwa konke sekusemveni lakho. Mina ngiyethemba ukuthi ngizokhipha emqondweni Wami lokhu okwenzekile ngaphambili, ngikukhiphe ngakunye ngakunye, noma lokhu kunzima kakhulu ukukwenza. Nokho Mina nginezindlela ezinhle zokukufeza lokhu. Akuthi ikusasa lakho limele okwakudala futhi livumele izithunzi zemva lakho zixoshwe ngokushintshana nobuwena beqiniso namuhla. Lokhu kusho ukuthi kumele ngikuhluphe ukuze wenze isinqumo futhi bese uyabona ukuthi wethembeke kubani.

Footnotes:
a. Umbhalo omdala ukhipha “ukwazi lokho.”
b. Buyela ogwini: isaga sase China, esichaza “ukuphenduka komunye ezindleleni ezingalungile.”                                             UMFULA OHLANZEKILE WAMANZI OKUPHILA